by Dr Pamela Stepphenson-Connolly
A self-concious anxiety can make us punish our bodies for being a certain way, particularly at this time of year. It's time to break a cycle ...
With the swimsuit season upon us, how much time are you spending worrying about your weight, skin and a whole host of "imperfections" that you find far easier to cover up in winter?
Many women fall into a pattern of seasonal body obsession (for example, any time we have to wear a swimsuit or a party dress). These habits can be difficult to change, but now it's the time to break a cycle.
First, challenge your thinking. Examine how much your view of your body shapes your happiness, sense of self-worth, sexuality and identity.
Ask yourself, "Do I respect my body? Am I grateful fo the way it has carried me through my life up until now, or am I angry with it for not matching up with my fantasy of being a size 10? Many women are alienated from their bodies. If this is true for you, it's time to make peace with your physical self.
Our bodies are living, active entities, not collections of parts. In order to stop focusing negative feelings on certain bits of our bodies, it helps to understand how and why we do it.
Try these exercises ...
1... Stand alone and naked in front of a full-length mirror and take a good look at yourself. Begin talking out loud about everything you see - all the true feelings and thoughts (good and bad) you have about each part of your body - from head to toe. You might say something like, "I'm proud of my silky hair, but I think my ears stick out too much and I hate my nose." Conciously note the level of negative and positive feelings about every aspect.
2... Write a list of all the things you feel about your body, including how well you think it has served you throughout your life so far.
3... Make peace with your body. Repeat the first exercise everyday for a week, each time looking in the mirror and finding a way to be more positive and accepting of every part of your body.
4... Spend some time mediating and writing about what you have discovered about your body image and how it effects your behaviour, sexulity, confidence and overall self-image. Where did you get those belief?
5...Work hard to catch yourself and halt the process of having negative thoughts about your body. This thought-stopping process involves :
Noticing: Become aware everytime judgement creeps in.
Interrupting: Stop those negative thoughts as soon as you notice them.
Changing: Challenge yourself to alter your thinking to something more positive, replacing with a thought such as, "My thighs are strong and womanly".
6...Choose food for health rather than weight control. Catch yourself whenever you have an urge to diet and, instead, make a choice that is geared towards health, such as improving your exercise regimen.
7... When it comes to sexuality, enjoy your body and focus on all the fantastic sensations it can provide.
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